Um... where has this year gone? Can it be that Mia will be 11 months soon? Was it just last year that I was heavily pregnant and thinking I couldn't get bigger (but did)? Yeah, apparently when you have a baby the world goes into warp speed. I was warned... but I didn't really listen, I must admit.
Its been on my mind lately because the time is coming... weaning. I'm going to start weaning Mia when she turns 11 months... a mere 8 days away. I'm torn. A part of me is relieved -- finally, a break! Some time away! Not having to plan every single day around when Mia will want to nurse. Since she decided that bottles were the worst thing ever to happen to breastmilk, I haven't been away from her for more than 5 hours when she was awake. I need some time to myself. I need a night away with my husband. I need my body to belong to me again.
But the other half? The other half of me just aches at the thought of it. I'm going to miss our special time. I'm going to miss being able to provide both nutrition and comfort. It's one of the only times that she cuddles, my little Miss Move-and-groove. And it's one of the last things tying her to being a baby. My baby. She's already taking steps. Trying to talk. Giving attitude (okay, so maybe she's been doing this for awhile...).
I had such a hard time learning to nurse. I joke that I've had every problem in the book except one (knock on wood)... but it's not really a joke. It was rough. There was blood, sweat, and tears. In those rough beginning months, I would count down the days and months until I was finished with nursing. "Only 11 months 2 weeks left." "Just 9 months, you can do this!" I'd tell myself. Now its just around the corner, and I'm in shock. I didn't enjoy the first 2-3 months of breastfeeding, I must admit. I only did it because I'm incredibly stubborn. But now?
Now, I'm glad. It's honestly one of the things I'm most proud of in my life. That may sound corny... and if it does you probably weren't around in the beginning. You didn't see how hard it was. You didn't feel the pain. See the trauma. Sit up late at night while she ate for hours. Fed her every two hours. Got infections. And blisters. Bitten. Rejected. Clung to.
And in the end? It was worth every second.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
You should be proud of nursing your daughter for as long as you have. Particularly since it was so difficult in the beginning for you. You stuck it out through some serious pain and did a good thing for both yourself and your little one.
KUDOS!
Post a Comment